Vivid

May 27, 2015May 27, 2015 raphaela994 Comments

So, my friend and I went to Vivid last Saturday night at Circular Quay. She is hysterically funny in that dry, laconic Australian way. I texted that my daughter and I were in the loos and wouldn’t be long. She said she would meet us there. I waited and waited and when she didn’t show, it dawned on me that perhaps she was at the facilities at the other end of the Quay. She was! We hugged, comfortable in our embrace as we are both under 5 feet tall. I gave her a birthday gift, which included size 5 (tiny), sparkly slippers. We walked around to the Opera House whilst it was still light and plonked down on the steps. Her daughter and mine got restless, so her husband offered to take them for a walk. We began a two hour chat full of enlightened dribble about my making a fortune off an upcoming YouTube channel featuring my guinea pigs, my filming her Tina Turner impersonation, and becoming her manager, and bursting into musicals whenever we heard key words.

Dusk was coming and the children and her husband still hadn’t returned. “I hope he hasn’t had a hypo,” she remarked. “Shit!” He is a diabetic and could well be disorientated. Fortunately, he sauntered over with the kids, and we went in search of food. We walked to The Rocks, and selected good, nutritious food from the market stalls, whilst the girls demanded pretzels. Us ladies all went to the loo, and took selfie’s (as you do).

My friend laughed, “we are here to see Vivid, this light festival… We haven’t seen a thing in three hours!” I laughed too, and said that when we get together, we have so much fun talking rubbish, laughing and taking bathroom selfie’s that we forget what we are there for.

She showed me these mints and I am now hankering after the tin.

We saw the MCA and Opera House Lights, and walked around to Customs House, where I captured this.

Our two IVF miracles adore each other, and were happy climbing trees and being together.

Thousands of people were trying to get through Circular Quay by 8pm. Someone sneezed and one of our tribe called out “bless you!” “Thankyou!” came the response alongside thousands of people laughing and smiling at the exchange. My friend’s husband needed something sweet to raise his blood sugar, and so he and the kids had ice cream. We saw hardly anything, but a festival is about the bringing together of people. That is what a ‘happening’ is. This is what Saturday night was.

Grief and Homecoming (Part 2)

May 18, 2015May 18, 2015 raphaela99Leave a comment

A woman with auburn hair was walking in front of me. She was holding the hand of a little boy. For a moment, I thought it was you… I kept seeing you everywhere. In the shops, in the park. You can’t be gone! The horrible realization struck me afresh.

You should be living in Balmain with your boys, your heart condition carefully monitored. I should be preparing to meet up with you, to share a meal for your birthday. The tears came as I sat in the park. Grief absolutely flattens you, like a tidal wave. It was a physical pain, so much so that I felt winded. What sets it off on any given day is a mystery. I went from weeping to laughter when I recalled you telling me about a party your eldest had attended. He was going to a religious preschool at five, and upon seeing the procession of fairies alighting from cars outside the venue, he hollered, “oh no! Not another #$%^&*# fairy party!” You were aghast, as all the mums heard him, though laughed uncontrollably on the retelling. Wiping my eyes, I went to get my daughter.

I was bemused to receive her worksheets. She had felt sorry for Dr Karl, as he didn’t have much hair, so she thought she would style him. She asked a lot of questions about guinea pigs which he answered concisely. When I asked why she had focused on guinea’s, she replied huffily, “they are a biology topic!” I took her for lemon gelato, and then she climbed trees in the main street.

We went home, and I received a message from Serena’s mum. She had sourced a Japanese Cherry tree. It became extinct in Japan and one specimen was found in an English garden in West Sussex. It was propagated from that tree (many more are now back in Japan due to this one specimen). Serena’s family were going to plant it tonight, and scatter her ashes around it. Serena was a world citizen and ardent traveller. She would have loved this. I looked through old photos, and lit a candle for my friend.

You said in your school yearbook that you wanted to be remembered for as long as possible. Oh darling, you shall be. Until we meet again, happy birthday Serena. I hope you can hear me sing to you.

Controversy

May 13, 2015May 15, 2015 raphaela992 Comments

You want to know what the most controversial post I put on Facebook was? It may surprise you to know that it wasn’t about religion, politics nor mothering. It was about…Punch bowls! I will give you a moment to digest that.

I found a marvellous photo on Pinterest about how to repurpose your old punch bowls, seeing as they rarely get used these days. Turn ’em into birdbaths! Brilliant! I excitedly shared this idea, only to be shouted down. “I would never do such a thing to a family heirloom! How dare you!” I was astonished by the replies. When I scrolled back to my post, there was a vigorous debate going on. I was fascinated, and thought about the storm whirring above my head. I came to the conclusion that the reaction wasn’t really about punch bowls. That would be silly. It was about stress and pressure and exhaustion. Misplaced cries carried in the wind.

Remember the grief after Princess Diana died? There were people weeping in the streets, inconsolable. The grief was certainly for her and her boys, but also for the individual person. The tears that they hadn’t been able to spill prior over the loss of loved ones… It gave people permission to console, reach out and sob. Now we have the internet, we have thousands of tunnels into the deep recesses of our minds. Anger, fear, grief and sorrow are syphoned out into the light. It isn’t just about punch bowls. When somebody becomes outraged at a seemingly innocuous post, remind yourself of that. Tread gently, with compassion.

A Food Tour

May 12, 2015May 12, 2015 raphaela993 Comments

My friend Nicci organized a Foodie Road Trip. I climbed aboard the bus with eighteen other ladies and our very patient driver. Our first stop was Eveleigh Markets at Carriage Works. It was sensory overload! You have to do a circuit of the market before honing in on individual stalls. There was a party atmosphere with music and puppies with woollen jackets. Great value and the variety was wondrous. Tables and chairs are assembled in the centre, so you can stop for breakfast.

Our next stop was Salt Meats Cheese at Alexandria. We were to take part in a three course Italian Cucina Regionale class and lunch. We explored the foods of Calabria. My being vegetarian posed no problem for our instructors, Manuela and Sarah. We were regaled as Manuela told us stories of raising her own family, and the feasts she would create. Making pasta from scratch is indeed therapeutic and I was delighted that the Maltagliati (badly cut pasta), was meant to be badly-shaped! We devoured the antipasto before beginning on the pasta, mine flavoured with chicory and cherry tomatoes. It was as good as it looks.

The sound of laughter on a drizzling Saturday afternoon was magical, as we imbibed in rich red wine and light white’s. It reinforced that this is how weekends were meant to be spent. Enjoyed with people you love, making food from scratch and lingering around the dining table. We shared dreams and fears, lives and bread. Nobody was in a hurry. Manuela and Sarah were lovely, even gifting us recipe sheets so we could attempt to recreate this wondrous meal.

Afterward, we went down the street to Vicinity Bar and Dining. Nicci and I had an English Garden cocktail, the taste subtle and delicious. A delightful end to a beautiful day.

Seeking Movement and Colour and Life (part 2)

April 9, 2015 raphaela993 Comments

Easter Monday, I needed to escape all the jobs that needed doing. I needed to watch my child have fun, and for her to carry me along in her whimsy. My friend Annette, and her son, were coming along for the ride. At the station I met another friend and her son.

It is like no time has passed when you meet old friends.

This lady is a professional dancer, and doesn’t walk through life, she saunters. The horticulturist, dancer and writer boarded the train with their kids, and struck up a conversation with these delightful people.

One of the ladies was a pharmacist from Missouri. I asked where these friends had met, and it turned out it was on a Pandora cruise! Seeing my puzzlement, my new friend Brenda handed us several precious bracelets.

Her late fiancée had bought quite a few pieces for her collection. They were holy. They weren’t inanimate objects, but relayed stories of times past and dreams yet to be fulfilled. Each bead held a piece of her soul, and were embedded with his devotion. We shared details of our lives. There was laughter and connectedness. My dancer friend departed with her son, as did Brenda and her friends.

This was on a stall in the ladies' at Museum Station — This was on a stall in the ladies’ at Museum Station. ‘Today is the first day of the rest of your life! Live!’

11136791_943793848987794_145063382_n — At Hyde Park, munchkin wanted to prove how strong she was.

We also met 'I am basketball man' — We also met ‘I am basketball man’

We couldn't resist purchasing some delicacies from this chocolate shop — We couldn’t resist purchasing some delicacies from this chocolate shop

Walking up to Susannah Place, we stopped at many wondrous shops, and admired the architecture along cobbled streets.

We had ice cream and saw more beauty, more colour, more life than we could absorb. The whole day was unscripted. That is what made it so glorious. There are more good people in the world than bad, and more wonder than you can possibly imagine. I love seeing Sydney through a child’s eyes.

Weird day today.

November 25, 2013April 7, 2015 raphaela991 Comment

After a concentrated, delightful weekend, I faced a weird day. One of those days when you feel out of sorts. I got home from pickup, the most pressing feature being getting feeling back through the right side of my body. A hot bath then voltage via my Tens machine! Yes! A missed call from my beautiful publicist, saying that Radio National wanted to interview me for White Ribbon Day. Oh my goodness! I called her back and she said I was to be interviewed live at 5.15pm! I felt a weight of responsibility on my shoulders. My little girl was excited and declared she would hold my hand throughout the interview. What a price to pay. It is a daily price. The pain never fades, in any respect. I am not doing any of this for me. I could have written children’s books from the start! I am whimsical and it is what I relish. I am ill-prepared for my story. It is ill-prepared for me.

My daughter is on her headphones, listening to Katy Perry, and singing her lungs out. We are cool! I feel the weight of responsibility on my shoulders. I am so sorry, so very sorry, for all those that didn’t survive. I am hoping to lead the way for all those that did and wonders what happens next. I am so glad I am here. I understand those that couldn’t hang on. At the end, there is nothing but love. It is hard to rebuild a life. I am still constructing, but after the violence ends, there is nothing but joy throughout the whole process. I am thinking of all who have been told they were nothing, have been abused in any manner possible this White Ribbon Day. Believe me, you are everything. xxx